12 STEP BY STEP GUIDES TO A GREAT RELATIONSHIP

Nothing that depends on human efforts happens by chance. The same is true about good relationships, they almost never just happen. They usually are a combination of hard work, honest communication, and going the extra mile to add a little magic. 

Here are 12 basic steps for creating a great relationship...

  

Step 1 

Be bold: Be willing to take the next step, to take the initiative. Do not wait until you are perfectly sure that this person is right for you. If you feel a strong attraction, take the risk and see what happens. Without this adventurous spirit you count too much on the other person to make the relationship happen.

  

Step 2

Be patient: Once you have begun the relationship, do not be in a hurry to forge a deep and meaningful bond. Build in a patient, step-by-step manner. Do not be pushy, but be persevering. If the relationship hits a rough patch, do not impulsively abandon ship. See how you can grow from the experience, and how to use it to build a stronger bridge between you and your partner.

  

Step 3 

Communicate pleasantly: In the early stages of a relationship, deep talk about strong emotional issues may actually send the other person running. You are just getting to know one another. Be witty. Enjoy fun chatting. Speak of entertaining matters more than serious matters. Share information, but nothing too heavy.

  

Step 4

Share emotionally nurturing experiences: Spend time with one another “playing house”. At this stage, you will begin to feel more like family. Accept that. Respect your partner’s increased vulnerability and respond with sensitivity. This is a stage for building emotional trust and a lasting level of closeness.

  

Step 5

Let yourself shine: Avoid becoming so entangled in the relationship that you lose your individuality. It is possible to be TOO concerned with the other person’s feelings and sensitivities. Do not be afraid to allow your greatness to glow. Perform in ways that shows off your talents and your gifts. Be open and forthright enough to express what you want to do, to let things revolve around you to the degree necessary for you to feel that you are being true to who you really are.

  

Step 6

Get serious: Pledges of loyalty are in order, or at least both need to understand the expectation of fidelity. Honesty is required to move things forward, even when that seems a bit painful. Be careful to avoid overanalyzing your partner though. There may be a tendency to become hyper-critical, as you move closer together and experience more emotional dependency upon one another.

  

Step 7

Work at getting along: After some painful self-exposure, a more diplomatic approach to one another may very likely be in order. You may no longer like everything about your partner, but that just means that some accommodating is in order. You are not going to like everything about anyone. Focus on harmonizing, on enjoying peaceful, pleasurable experiences. If you try to make some final decisions about the relationship at this point, you will most likely feel terribly indecisive. The pros and cons may seem about even.

  

Step 8

Advance to deeper inner planes: Your spiritual interests or paths will need to be reconciled at this point, and your sexual bond will become far more significant to both of you. You will be wanting more of one another, and it may feel like a sacrifice to give it – but it is a worthwhile sacrifice, because you are heading into a level of far deeper and more satisfying oneness. As a consequence of your bond, you both may feel like you are turning into different people. Your relationship is ending your old life and giving birth to a new one.

  

Step 9

In the previous stage there was probably a tendency toward enclosing the two of you in a kind of cocoon, and being very concentrated together.  Now it is time to balance that out. Get out of any rut that may have begun to form. Travel far and wide, even if you travel apart. You need some space to reconnect with your individuality and you need to join with others for the refreshing sense of social expansion.  

  

Step 10

Begin plan for the future: You have built something and you will want to make use of it. Now is the time to begin forming mutual goals for how you want the relationship to serve your lives. Do you want children? Are you also married to a career? Where do you both want to live? It is time to get very practical, to make the relationship part of the whole life-success that you are after.

  

Step 11

This is the quirkiest stage of the relationship. You might find that your individualities and eccentricities get a bit in the way. A rebellious, free spirit may take hold. Do not struggle to rein in your partner. Permit the freedom of movement and self-expression that is desired. For the two of you to be happy together, you need to feel free to discover yourselves, to change, to feel liberated rather than penned in by the relationship.

  

Step 12

The union is now here: You feel what the other feels and think what  the other thinks. There is a melding. Now spirituality will have a serious place. You will need to feel that your relationship is in tune with the universe, that it is truly meant to be. To accomplish this, try engaging in spiritual practice or a religious path either together or separately. If you can grow spiritually together, you will KNOW that you are meant to be. This is a time for meditating to get clear deep within that this relationship is right for you.

Let's hear your thoughts, if the article is helpful. Better still, you can share your thoughts on things to do to forge a great relationship...