Healthy Relationship? 12 Signs You Are in One

The biggest challenge people tend to be faced with in relationship is determining if the relationship is healthy or otherwise. It is just normal that one craves the assurance that one is with the right individual. But most often than not, as simple as the task of realising if one is in the healthy relationship seems to sound, it is yet a tricky one to navigate. 

Relationship is supposed to bring out the best in one. But not all relationships serve this purpose. A relationship which undermines one's strength rather than build one up is definitely not a healthy one, and it is not serving its purpose.

Confused if your relationship is serving you the right purpose? Take a deep look at the following points. If your immediate reaction to each of the points raised is a nod in the affirmative, be rest assured you are with the right partner and your relationship is healthy. But if deep down in you all you get is a long feeling of discontent, then you are in a relationship that is taking you nowhere but a crash landing. 

• Do You Speak Your Mind?

Relationships only thrive when partners can express themselves freely and honestly. No topic is deemed off-limits, and both partners feel heard. Consistent communication is vital to building a lasting life together. A healthy relationship is not one where your voice is cowed.

• Do You Have Your Own Space?

Being in love does not mean one should not have some time to oneself. Taking time to pursue one's own interests and friendships helps keep relationship fresh and provides partners the opportunity to grow as individuals—even while growing as a couple. A relationship where either of the partners is clingy and pathetically possessive is far from a healthy one.

• Do You Like Yourself And Your Partner?

This ultimately is the bedrock on which relationship should be built. Couples should cherish who their partner is now, and not who they intend them to be. A healthy relationship is one where partners recognise that neither of them is perfect, and yet accept and value each other for who they are right now - not who they might become. Great chances are that if you do not like your partner now, nothing would happen in the future to change how you feel about him or her. So don’t base your partnership on the hope that it will change. 

• Do You Make Decisions Jointly?

A healthy relationship is one where neither the partner calls all the shots. Decision making should be a joint efforts of the couple. It does not matter if the decision involves trivial issues such as what movie to see or delicate stuffs like how many children to have. Couples are expected to make decisions together and listen to each other’s concerns and desires.

• Do You Find Joy?

Healthy relationships are full of laughter and fun. But this is not saying it should be all giddy every hour of the day—or that one's partner will not drive one up the wall sometimes—but it does mean that the partners' life together is mostly happy in simple ways. 

• Do You Treat Each Other With Kindness?

Nothing is more important than treating the person one loves with care, consideration, empathy, and appreciation. A relationship where one or both partners do not respect each other's feeling is everything short of being a healthy affair. If you or your partner find treating people you hardly know with respect easier than you show each other, it is probably time you took a step back and revisited your priorities.

• Are You Intimate?

Sex is an important integral part of healthy relationships, but it is only one part. Sex, which is about physical satisfaction, should not be confused as intimacy. Intimacy is more about bonding, friendship, and familiarity. Partners in a healthy relationship feel connected—in and out of bed.

• Do You Trust Each Other?

Healthy relationships are built on trust and committed communication without reservations or secrets. Partners should trust each other, if the relationship is expected to stand the test of time. Nothing good can come out of a relationship where trust is lacking. 

• Do You Fight?

Disagreements are a normal thing in relationships, bearing in mind that partners are two individuals coming from different backgrounds. Chances are that either or both partners in a relationship are holding back, if they never have moments of disagreement. But when people in healthy relationships fight, they fight productively and fairly. There would be no name-calling or put-downs. Instead, disagreements should help foster a better understanding between partners,  and not serve as means of trying to score cheap points. Partners in a healthy relationship are willing to apologise when they are in the wrong.

• Do You Talk To Your Partner, Not To Other People?

Partners in a healthy relationship make it a point to discuss issues and concerns with each other, and not Facebook friends. Third party's involvement in one's every relationship issue is not a hallmark of a healthy relationship.

• Do You Let Things Go?

Offences will surely come in relationships. It is most certain that one partner will get on the wrong end of things of the other partner. Words that are not meant will be uttered at some points. And there is no disputing the certainty that either partner at some point will let inconsiderate behaviours show. The important thing is how these moments of disappointment are dealt with. And the only right way to deal with offences in a healthy relationship is to tell one's that one is disappointed, of course—then let it go!

• Do You Say The Magic Words?

 “I love you”, “Thank you,” and “I’m sorry.” are expressions that are freely used and sincerely meant in healthy relationships.