Relationships: Better Based on Being in Love or Having Mutual Understanding?

There is no denying the fact that many of the relationship stories you have heard of or read about would have left you in great bewilderment over whatever made things go wrong. There is even a good chance that your personal experience(s) at sharing relationship with that man/woman has/have left you at the mercy of unprecedented consternation.

I am sure that we all have one heartrending story of a relationship to tell when quizzed. But I am in doubt, if many of us have been too willing to face the truth: analysing what really made a once great relationship nosedive into a devastating ending. 

Let us face it, many people would readily argue that love is the most important ingredient needed to keep a relationship afloat. But haven't a great number of relationships that started out built on love ended in shambles? We all talk of our first loves, but how many people have really ended up with their first loves? Hasn't love failed, time and again, in keeping relationships going? The sad truth remains that every heartbreak story you have ever heard, read or even experienced was once a love story.

Don't get it twisted, I am an ardent proponent of LOVE in relationships. And I believe that love is a needed spice in creating a sparkling appealing feel in every relationship. Yet, I am still not going to deny that I strongly don't agree to the notion that to have a relationship that makes for a happy ending, love is the key. Love makes a relationship tick. Yes! But without doubt, love has failed a lot of relationships too. Anyone willing to argue this? 

So, on what should relationship be based you want to ask aloud? I am of convinced opinion that relationships should be entrenched in mutual understanding rather than love. Mutual understanding in relationship proves to have succeeded where 'being in love' has failed! Yes, you can love someone you don't understand. Remember the cliche, love at first sight? So, it is possible to love someone you do not understand. Loving someone whom one does not understand is the reason one suspects one's partner's every move. And I believe you will agree with me that domestic violence stems from lack of mutual understanding between partners.

Many sad relationship experiences, in a nutshell boil down to things not being mutual. Being in love with someone who you do not understand or vice versa brings with it lack of mutual interests, lack of mutual words and actions, lack of mutual values, lack of mutual care, trust and respect, and lack of mutual feelings in the relationship. And this will ultimately result in conflict of interests big enough to tear the relationship apart. Remember without mutual understanding, whatever you have in mind for your relationship is not going to happen. You can be in love on your own...but mutual understanding in a relationship takes two! 

Separate out what you think and feel. Remember that love, no matter how healthy it is, does not make you and your partner Siamese twins or Mystic Megs. It is great to fall in love, but it is better to do so with someone with whom you share mutual understanding. Love may set you out on a fantastic note in your relationship journey but mutual understanding is all that is needed, if you are going to last the whole length of the journey! 

Yeah, ten out of ten times, I would take being in a relationship with someone I understand and who understands me in return over falling head over heels in love with someone who barely understands what makes me tick. 

Your thoughts?